so, here's the story, as how i remember it while my arms are recovering from numbness, my stomach is begging to be filled and i'm not exactly appreciating the massive attack track playing on launch right now.

i do remember the driver beside me telling the new passenger to sit down and could you please put off your cigarette? meanwhile i'm still pissed off with the girl who sat beside me (very selfish of me, yes we probably both had big asses).

i did feel some strange movement behind me, i thought oh, the new passenger is having a hard time squishing his ass in what little space was left in the jeep. more movement, oh boy, there's really no space left? i turned my head in time to see the red bonnet of the man who was asking for everybody's bags.

flashback to a conversation i had with my folks two weekends ago. we were talking about my professor's reluctance to take jeeps and buses on account of a mugging in the late 90s. (no wonder his usual reference to vehicles were confined to cabs.) his was on knifepoint and gunpoint. the poor guy was obviously too traumatized as he talks of petty crimes (are they that petty anyway?) with such frequency (of course we were reading discipline and punish so it does have relevance.)

back to my parents. and here goes tatay again and his brushes with death which explains his flare-ups when things are awry in the house, security-wise. it is in these conversations when i get to know tatay more. he has seen a lot of the world even if he hasn't left the asean region. a gun pointed to his head, his chopper nearly crashing to a cliff (what was the cliff doing there, stupid cliff), rough life at the cattle ranch. and this is the man nanay and i am talking to during weekends and loves quoting from the latest james michener novel he is devouring.

here's his point: malas mo na lang, neng. not a shred of sympathy there, not even a trace of displaced anger. the good thing about him is that he won't give you the wry 'been there, done that' tone and facial expression.

my sister used to add, kung panahon mo na, panahon mo na.

again his point: choose your battles. nanay interrupted, how about that can of mace i found among your sister's things? i replied, i would have none of that mace shit. by the time i manage to position it in front of the person's face, i'd be a goner. anyway, tatay resumes talking, you know the basic attack points on a person's body. yep yep. seen too many self-defense segments on tv.

as the three men (or were they two? numbers don't count anymore) were grabbing bags, my right hand immediately went for the bag's zipper, locating the decoy wallet which - shit, had no token money. and fuck, there are just too many things in this bag, i hate this backpack i can't find the fucking decoy wallet fuck he'd better go for my seatmate's cellphone first because she's been annoying the hell out of me, oblivious little shit, blase and all, and where's that fucking wallet?

i didn't find the wallet anyway. it was at the bottom of my books, bottles, scarf, extra jacket. some decoy wallet.

the three men didn't head for the front seat, for some reason. it was upon realizing that they were gone that my arms went numb. my seatmate finally caught on what just happened. oblivious little shit.

'e nage-edit pa man ako ng text.' (need i say more?)

the driver was at a loss for words. all of the passengers were in a cacophony of voices, all trying to describe the men who boarded the jeep, where they got on and alighted, whether to report or not. next were the wails of my form 5, may pera ka pa sa bahay?

i was waiting for the golden arches towards the end of katipunan to be within sight.

owing to sleepiness and hunger and the fact that nothing was taken from me, i am in no position to generate a full-bodied reaction.

all i can think of is this: to all of the pickpockets who have preyed on me numerous times (philcoa, you da best!) thank you for not making me aware that you were already slashing/opening the zipper of my bag.

one more thing: i can hear tatay's voice right now weaving with that of the lady from portishead.